Monday, February 23, 2009

i want to change the world, instead, i sleep...

i just spent the last 30 minutes crying my eyes out as i watched a walk to remember.

haha. seriously! it used to be my favorite movie back in highschool and i hadn't watched it in years, but it seems to get my every time. i think i cry at different parts every time i watch it though, which is interesting, but i guess it impacts me in different ways every time i see it.

its a little cheesy in some parts, i know that, but i still think its an incredible story. and while there are many ways in which i dont want to be like the character of jamie in the story, there are alot of ways in which i'd love to be like her! i wish i were as strong a person as she was. to not care what people thought of me. to be bold about my faith. and to change people's as i inspire the greatness in them. i hope that one day i can be that kind of person.

there is a great song by ingrid michaelson that always gets me.
"a storm is coming, but i dont mind.
people are dying, i close my blinds.
all that i know is i'm breathing, all i can do is keep breathing...

i want to change the world, instead i sleep.
i want to believe in more than you and me.
but all that i know is i'm breathing, all i can do i keep breathing now...."

somedays i look at my life and i think, wow, i am such a mess.
i dont know how i am ever going to make a difference.
but i have faith that God can use me in much greater ways than i could ever imagine.

as jamie says in a walk to remember, "maybe God had a bigger plan for me than i had for myself."

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